| In the epic battle between Pirates and Ninjas, there has always remained a single question: Who will be victorious? |
| ___________________________________ |
Although many people believe that this would
be an easily one-sided battle, there can be no
clear victor unless you understand the natures
of each side. Pirates are men (or sometimes
very manly women with hair on their upper lips)
who make livings by stealing treasure. Now
there are only 3 rules to being a pirate:
-You must be uglier than sin.
-If you find a hidden treasure, you must
bury it. No keeping it.
-You must make land-lubbers walk the
plank.
Ninjas live lives that are quite similar to pirates.
The main differences are:
-You have to own (and wear) a black
jumpsuit. All the time. Yes, even in
your sleep.
-You have to be able to use nunchucks.
-You cut people's heads off just because
you can. That's badass.
Now then, the most common argument for the
pirates is that they have guns. This is a very
good point. However, what most people don't
know is that ninjas can dodge bullets, making
pirate's guns obsolete. Also the fact that ninjas
are invisible at night makes them impossible to
aim at. Also, there is another point that needs
to be brought to the surface. What most
people don't know is that every single pirate is
born in Canada. This destroys their chances of
winning against a ninja (From JAPAN. Not
CANADA).
If you have any opinions about this battle,
please e-mail me with your name, address,
phone number, credit card number/expiration
date, social security number, vehicle
registration, another credit card number, and a
photocopy of your current driver's license.
No but really. If you have an opinion e-mail it to
me along with your first name and I might add it
to this page.
be an easily one-sided battle, there can be no
clear victor unless you understand the natures
of each side. Pirates are men (or sometimes
very manly women with hair on their upper lips)
who make livings by stealing treasure. Now
there are only 3 rules to being a pirate:
-You must be uglier than sin.
-If you find a hidden treasure, you must
bury it. No keeping it.
-You must make land-lubbers walk the
plank.
Ninjas live lives that are quite similar to pirates.
The main differences are:
-You have to own (and wear) a black
jumpsuit. All the time. Yes, even in
your sleep.
-You have to be able to use nunchucks.
-You cut people's heads off just because
you can. That's badass.
Now then, the most common argument for the
pirates is that they have guns. This is a very
good point. However, what most people don't
know is that ninjas can dodge bullets, making
pirate's guns obsolete. Also the fact that ninjas
are invisible at night makes them impossible to
aim at. Also, there is another point that needs
to be brought to the surface. What most
people don't know is that every single pirate is
born in Canada. This destroys their chances of
winning against a ninja (From JAPAN. Not
CANADA).
If you have any opinions about this battle,
please e-mail me with your name, address,
phone number, credit card number/expiration
date, social security number, vehicle
registration, another credit card number, and a
photocopy of your current driver's license.
No but really. If you have an opinion e-mail it to
me along with your first name and I might add it
to this page.
| By the way, this WAS written by me. Just making that clear because there are some people who were doubtful... |
